What has happened since childhood, infancy even, is that a protective shield or pattern was subconsciously created to minimize the pain of feeling alone or of not being seen by a caregiver or partner.
People with ADD are hypersensitive. That is not a fault or a weakness of theirs, it is how they were born. — Dr. Gabor Maté, "Scattered: How Attention Deficit Disorder Originates and What You Can Do About It" I highly recommend the book "Scattered: How Attention Deficit Disorder Originates and What You Can Do About It" [...]
I recently read In the Realm of "Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction" by Dr. Gabor Mate´. I've found Dr. Maté's philosophies and experience regarding addiction and its origins fascinating. Essentially he says pain is the fuel of all addiction. We use substances and behavior to self-soothe. He does not believe it is primarily genetic. He [...]
What is social anxiety? In my book, The Quiet Rise of Introverts, I define social anxiety as the fear of social or performance situations where embarrassment, judgment, criticism or rejection are perceived dangers. Somewhere along the line, as someone with social anxiety, we learned that we do not fare well under scrutiny. We fall short in [...]
As we plunge into the holiday season, I thought it would be a good time to take inventory of our go-to behaviors for relieving stress. Internal resources According to Julie M. Simon, LMFT and author of When Food Is Comfort, if we grew up with encouraging nurturing caregivers, we acquire capabilities such as personal competencies and [...]
The chapter titled, Do Your Nervous Systems Play Well?, in marriage therapist, Stan Tatkin's book, Wired for Dating: How Understanding Neurobiology and Attachment Style Can Help You Find Your Ideal Mate, grabbed my attention as a highly sensitive person. I've known for seven years that my nervous system is more easily aroused than about 80% of the population. I startle more [...]
