Responsibly Setting Limits in a Long-Term Relationship

By |2021-02-16T10:41:22-06:00February 5th, 2021|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

  I have harbored a lot of resentment over the years. The chief cause? A feeling that my partner buries me with the majority of the mundane, daily, essential, non-glamorous and non-paying household jobs while they soar at their interesting, daily, essential, sexy and high paying careers. The resentment only grew when they expected praise and [...]

The Difference Between Neediness and Needing

By |2021-02-02T16:09:51-06:00January 29th, 2021|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

She is commonly afraid of needing too much and then being rejected, judged or abandoned. Rejection, judgment, and abandonment are most painful because deep inside her unconscious she holds the incorrect belief that she is unworthy of receiving more. This belief was formed and reinforced in childhood every time she had to suppress her feelings, needs [...]

Avoidant Attachment and Caregiving

By |2020-12-10T12:22:07-06:00December 11th, 2020|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Guest Posts, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

It seems like I have written more personal update posts this year than ever before. Well, here comes another one. Last week my husband had triple bypass surgery. We found out two weeks prior that he had five significant blockages in his arteries. Needless to say, we were thrown into a bit of a tizzy. He [...]

How Much Do Your Environment and Your Relationships Shape Your Personality?

By |2020-05-22T12:09:31-05:00May 22nd, 2020|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

I just did one of those personal profile inventories for work. It is based on the Myers Briggs inventory but abbreviated. Interestingly, my results came back significantly different from my Myers Briggs preferences of eight, nine years ago. It made me again believe that we change as we age and go through different circumstances. Tale of [...]

Attunement in Parenting and Adult Relationships

By |2020-03-18T13:37:36-05:00March 20th, 2020|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

Over the years,  I've learned how important attunement or active emotional engagement is in relationships. I have noticed misconceptions around what attunement is and what it looks like. In my own relationships, I have missed the boat horribly many times when it comes to applying full attention or rest periods.

Loss of Autonomy: How One of Our Greatest Fears Affects Relationships

By |2020-03-06T16:10:48-06:00March 6th, 2020|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

The things we fear losing the most: autonomy, identity and a positive future. If you can help someone maintain their autonomy, identity and future, they will feel safer and more willing to collaborate.

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Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring… Read more
J.K.
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need … Read more
D.R.

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