Coping Mechanisms: Useful or Not Useful?

By |2019-09-18T17:13:45-05:00September 20th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

When we struggle, we make adaptations to our personalities and our behavior to get through the discomfort. I've previously written about coping strategies. They generally develop because we need more attention or less pain from our primary caregivers and family members. We may learn to be a people-pleaser or extra nice so as not to upset [...]

How You Were Raised and How It Affects Your Relationships

By |2019-06-14T14:01:50-05:00June 14th, 2019|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

It's summer and I'm getting married next month. My posts over the next few months may be lighter, shorter or even non-existent. There are a lot of new dynamics at play in our now household of seven. My time and energy are devoted to making these go smoothly. Since we have been meshing my fiance Mark's [...]

Your Coping Strategies: Are They Still Serving You?

By |2018-11-21T12:50:45-05:00November 23rd, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

As we plunge into the holiday season, I thought it would be a good time to take inventory of our go-to behaviors for relieving stress. Internal resources According to Julie M. Simon, LMFT and author of When Food Is Comfort, if we grew up with encouraging nurturing caregivers, we acquire capabilities such as personal competencies and [...]

Spring Break Post: Family Time in Los Angeles

By |2018-04-05T11:05:07-05:00April 6th, 2018|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

Hi Everyone! I decided to sneak in a post for this week even though we're on vacation. This is going to be an informal one. I'm in LA with my kids, my sister and her family. Mark, my fiance (see last week's post), is not with us, but will be with us for all future family [...]

When Fun Feels Taxing: Surviving a Socially Packed Weekend

By |2018-03-25T16:26:57-05:00March 16th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Scott Warman on Unsplash Last Thursday, I had that feeling of impending overwhelm. I looked at my calendar and saw four highly engaging events in a row starting on Friday at 4:15PM and running through Sunday morning. I saw very little downtime between endeavors and lots of being "on". Most introverts or [...]

Is Efficiency Ruining Our Ability to Love, Learn and Enjoy?

By |2019-01-27T14:27:29-05:00August 25th, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Like most people, I've adopted a level of efficiency as a survival mechanism. With three kids, a home, a career, a partner and friends, I strive for effectiveness so I can keep going without getting buried under it all. I eat leftovers, put things back where I found them, have a system for ordering groceries, do [...]

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During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
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Evan H.
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would…

Mom M
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i…
Niko
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
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