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The mental, spiritual and social changes associated with the breakdown of a marriage.

Seductive Security: Living Without the Protective Embrace of a Committed Relationship

By |2015-10-21T14:13:25-05:00February 24th, 2012|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

White gloved servers traverse the dining space, stepping around and between linen covered tables and well-heeled guests. Impressive shrimp dangle from cocktail glasses and decadent chocolate  desserts abound. Giant topiary spheres encrusted in twinkly white lights hang from the ceiling on invisible tethers. A highly professional band plays Motown classics as well as current pop tunes. It's December [...]

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Alone and In Love: To Couple or Not?

By |2015-09-22T16:07:15-05:00February 10th, 2012|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

Fall in love when you're ready not when you're lonely. ~ From Marc and Angel Hack Life What helped me accept the end of my marriage? Knowing I would be OK by myself.  In fact, I would be better off alone than in the relationship. I reached the point where I could cut away the safety [...]

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When Parenting Overwhelms:Tough Days as an Introverted Parent

By |2015-10-23T20:27:29-05:00January 27th, 2012|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

Most of my introvert friends are childless or have one child.  They seemed to have instinctively known their child-rearing capabilities and stopped while they were ahead.  I on the other hand barreled through every red flag that warned me.  I overlooked the need for long spans of time to myself.  I didn't notice how much I [...]

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Let's Not Reduce Everything to Numbers: An Antidote to the Unsatisfying Way We Account for Our Existence

By |2015-09-22T16:07:16-05:00January 20th, 2012|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Processing Divorce|Tags: , , , , , , , |

Never worry about numbers.  Help one person at a time, and always start with the person nearest you. ~ Mother Teresa One of the hardest things about divorce is seeing everything reduced to numbers.  Credit cards, bank accounts and insurance policies are quantifiable representations of an existence thrown in a pile, divvied up or shut down. [...]

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Reframing Emptiness: Gaining Perspective When a Relationship Ends

By |2015-09-22T16:07:16-05:00January 13th, 2012|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , |

This is it.  The last day we share a home, a closet, a bathroom and utility bills. My husband and I try to look busy as the movers load the last of his things. The men remove the protective padding from the door frames and close up the back of the truck. Jeff (husband) rushes off [...]

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How a Sad Life Change Can Make You Extraordinary or Why Crying With Dan Fogelberg Is a Good Thing

By |2015-09-22T16:07:16-05:00January 6th, 2012|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Popular Posts, Processing Divorce|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

It's New Year's Eve 2011, the last time we gather to celebrate as a nuclear family. My soon to be ex-husband hangs out in the study.  The kids alternate between their  Lego creations and banal shows on the Disney Channel.  I scurry around the kitchen trying to put together a festive meal of appetizers.  I love [...]

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That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un… Read more
Gary
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need … Read more
D.R.
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i… Read more
Niko
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
your depth of understanding, and talent at sharing it amaze me. Speechless… and for your sharing of it.. Thank you… deeply. *sigh, its like coming back into my body through acceptance….. Sherrie on space2live
Sherrie
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon

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