The pleasure, pain and growth of human connection.

Finding a Safe Haven with Your Partner : The Sweetness of Not Having to Protect Your Soft Heart

By |2016-08-01T07:50:15-05:00April 22nd, 2016|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

This week, I learned my number one need in a relationship. I think many of you will relate. At the end of the day, after running around trying to get everyone's physical and emotional needs met, after the work, after the stress, after reconciling the good and the bad news, after establishing and maintaining boundaries,  after [...]

Introvert Relationships: Avoidant Attachment Style and Introversion

By |2017-02-03T10:45:45-06:00April 15th, 2016|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

A few years ago while engaging in the online dating scene, one intriguing man —a big guy with a blue-collar job and an intellectual mind— brought the term avoidant attachment style to my attention. He and I had one or two dates and several emails filled with interesting and meaningful conversation. We both were huge readers fascinated by personal [...]

Intuitive Introverts with Action Oriented Partners: Getting Your Connection Needs Met

By |2016-04-01T10:18:40-05:00April 1st, 2016|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

artwork by Marcelo Monreal I recently figured out one of my super powers. Introverted intuition. I took a personality assessment (for the millionth time) on the Personality Hacker website and came up an INFJ in the Myers Briggs type indicator. I sincerely go back and forth between INFJ and INFP. I know purists will [...]

Can This Introvert – Extrovert Relationship Be Saved?

By |2016-05-13T15:49:10-05:00March 25th, 2016|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

There's a theme among my new clients. It is extroverts alone after a breakup with an introvert. The extroverts wonder what made their introverted mates leave and if they will ever come back. In the beginning With my new clients, the beginning of the relationship was heady and incredibly satisfying. They spent lots of time together. Their partners were like [...]

An Intuitive Introvert Redefines Typical: The New Normal Is Sensitive, Reflective and Recharged

By |2016-07-15T14:50:11-05:00February 26th, 2016|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

I don't know if I could make it as a 'normal' person. I sincerely don't think I could work a 40+ hour/week office job, raise kids, maintain my home, nurture a romantic relationship and keep up social ties. My nervous system begs for calm. I do everything so deeply and with such conscientiousness, I believe I would [...]

If You Love an Introvert

By |2016-02-19T11:18:33-06:00February 19th, 2016|Categories: Guest Posts, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Intuitive Living, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

She was the one at the party hanging back from the crowd, but she wasn’t doing nothing. From the look in her eyes, you could tell she was watching the scene and not missing a thing. When you talked to her, she didn’t bore you with superficial chatter about her weekend — she actually had something meaningful to [...]

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For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i… Read more
Niko
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need … Read more
D.R.
I have been dating an introverted man who I am very in love with for almost 2 years.  Reading your posts have helped me to be more supportive and understanding to him especially during the times when he needs space.  I just wanted to thank you for your weekly posts and let you know how helpful they are for someone who is in a relationship with an introvert. C.M. on space2live
C.M.
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t… Read more
Evan H.
That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un… Read more
Gary
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring… Read more
J.K.

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