My friend, Kimber, said it is better to make a partner or child feel safe than make them feel comfortable. "What is the difference?" I asked. She said, "If someone feels safe, they can be vulnerable. If we strive to only make them comfortable, they never have to be vulnerable."
Have you ever felt taken for granted by a partner? Perhaps, it seemed like they only noticed you if you did something for them, or worse, they didn't notice you at all even when you fulfilled all of your duties. I've been there and I definitely did not like the feeling of being used. It felt like [...]
Photo via Pixabay Most relationships move into a more sedate, post-honeymoon phase. After the good bonding, falling-in-love chemicals (dopamine, oxytocin) dissipate and we perceive permanence in our relationship, we subconsciously start to miss the arousal and excitement of newness and chemicals. We can make healthy choices and work on ways to keep our relationship [...]
Photo by Igor Rand on Unsplash The other night my daughter face-timed me from her dad's house. The first thing she asked was if she had any appointments after school this week. I said, "Yes, you have a doctor's appointment after school on Monday". She immediately got mad and told me how much homework [...]
photo credit Ib Wira Dyatmika Every relationship has times of disconnection. These times are not concerning unless 1. They are constant and highly stressful or 2. There are no repairs made. In fact, relationships where there are ruptures in connection but consistent and quick repairs, tend to have the most resilience. Disruptions in therapy or [...]
"...love is a continual process of seeking and losing emotional connection, and reaching out to find it again. The bond of love is a living thing. If we don't attend to it, it naturally begins to wither." — Dr. Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight In our world of endless distractions and to do lists, it is [...]