Stories for and about those who recharge in solitude and feel life deeply.

Reducing Reactivity: Soothing the Sensitive Person

By |2018-11-09T09:47:07-06:00November 9th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

Some of us have been primed for high reactivity. Our early caregivers or past relationships did not provide consistent comforting and nurturing, so our nervous systems developed a sensitivity to possible abandonment. We tend to react strongly if we feel at all threatened. Sometimes these strong reactions lead to self-fulfilling prophesies. The more we react, the [...]

Does Your Partner Accept Your Influence? The Importance of Sharing Decision-Making in a Relationship

By |2018-10-31T11:59:21-05:00November 2nd, 2018|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

I recently figured out one of the striking blows that destroyed my marriage. During the last five years of our marriage, I did not feel like my words or actions were given any credence in conversations, problem-solving or decision-making. My husband did not accept my influence. I hope by casting light on this common issue, someone [...]

Support Systems, Voids and Values

By |2019-01-13T17:35:17-06:00October 19th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

It was a cold Sunday morning. I wanted to stay home, snuggle with my man, drink tea, read and eventually get ready for the Vikings football party we were hosting later that day. But I told my friend Nicole, I would be there to cheer her on during the Twin Cities marathon. I committed to being [...]

Something Had to Give

By |2018-10-11T20:05:05-05:00October 12th, 2018|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People|

Hi Everyone, There will be no real post this week. I made every effort to fit in writing time but the universe had other plans, like a shoulder injury, a fruit fly infestation and once-in-a-lifetime friend events I could not miss. To maintain my emotional and physical well being, I am giving myself a break from [...]

Perfectionism Won’t Protect You but It May Make You Invisible

By |2018-09-28T12:06:59-05:00October 5th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

"If we just try hard enough we can avoid all these situations that make us feel so vulnerable."  — Caroline McGraw How many of us can relate to the above statement? I know I can. For the longest time, I thought if I do everything just right, no one will call me out or criticize me. [...]

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You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t… Read more
Evan H.

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would… Read more

Mom M
That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un… Read more
Gary
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
your depth of understanding, and talent at sharing it amaze me. Speechless… and for your sharing of it.. Thank you… deeply. *sigh, its like coming back into my body through acceptance….. Sherrie on space2live
Sherrie
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring… Read more
J.K.
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan

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