How to Build Resilience: Normalizing Struggles Versus Eliminating Them

By |2019-03-22T14:26:36-05:00March 22nd, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

Snowplow parents prepare the road for kids. Responsible parents prepare the kids for the road. Resilience is built not by eliminating struggle, but by normalizing it. Teach kids to see obstacles as temporary hurdles. — Adam Grant My son suffered a concussion in February. He is still dealing with the symptoms. He is going to school [...]

Why We Find More Happiness After Age 50: The Struggles of Our 40s and the Contentment of Our 50s

By |2019-03-15T15:09:45-05:00March 15th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

I turn 49 tomorrow. According to author Jonathon Rauch (The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50), I'm at the bottom of the happiness curve, but things will be on the upswing very soon. He says our 40s are the bottom of the joy trough. Our values change in our 50s to create upward momentum. [...]

Confidence and Completing Things: The Secrets to Evading Anxiety

By |2019-03-10T13:43:54-05:00March 8th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

In order to have real confidence, you not only need to succeed at what you're doing. You need to COMPLETE things (of course, some things should be dropped). If you've been avoiding things in your life, then you can't have confidence. — Benjamin Hardy I've been thinking about how good it feels to complete things. Introverts and [...]

Using Values to Rise Above Heavy Emotions and Take Action

By |2019-02-28T14:01:20-06:00March 1st, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

We've talked about how our deepest voids lead us to our deepest values. In this post, I want to show how our deepest emotions are also signposts to our deepest values. Think about when you find yourself feeling the most sad, mad or enthusiastic. What is going on? Harvard Medical School psychologist and author of Emotional [...]

What If We Put Our Partners First and Children Second?

By |2019-02-22T11:20:46-06:00February 22nd, 2019|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

Hi All, I'm sharing a piece I wrote for Thrive Global with you for this Friday's post. Here is the link Putting Our Partners First and Children Second. As a parent and partner, I know the difficulties involved with caring for both children and a partner. This post offers a few simple ideas to increase your [...]

Three Questions to Smooth Out Conflict and Increase Understanding

By |2019-02-15T11:08:32-06:00February 15th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

One of the most useful things I've learned over the last few years is that it is better to aim for understanding versus winning when it comes to disagreements with the ones we love. For many years — including those competing with my sister for attention and respect and those competing with my ex-husband for most [...]

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During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
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what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
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Evan H.
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring… Read more
J.K.
I have been dating an introverted man who I am very in love with for almost 2 years.  Reading your posts have helped me to be more supportive and understanding to him especially during the times when he needs space.  I just wanted to thank you for your weekly posts and let you know how helpful they are for someone who is in a relationship with an introvert. C.M. on space2live
C.M.
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i… Read more
Niko
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would… Read more

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