Last week I wrote about avoiding or approaching difficult situations and relationships. I spoke of how we all sometimes avoid challenges by: leaving, going silent, diving into distractions (technology/work/television, etc.) or using drugs and alcohol. This week I want to talk about how to approach the things that scare us. Fortify first First, let's prepare by [...]
Often the easy way out is to avoid something hard. We all have moments of weakness when we opt for that path. We also have moments of courage when we move toward a difficult situation or conversation. In my experiences of parenting, marriage, coaching, writing, working within the juvenile justice system and as a special education [...]
A landmark longitudinal study done in San Diego by Drs. Vincent Felitti and Dr. Robert Anda and colleagues, links adverse childhood experiences (ACES) with increased risk for heart disease, addiction, cancer and auto-immune diseases, to name a few. The book, The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity came across my radar twice in the [...]
How are you at asking for help? Does it come easy to you? Do you trust you will be assisted? Does it make you feel anxious? Do you try to avoid it? I have discovered that asking for help sets off a cascade of emotions and defenses for me. When Mark and I first started dating, [...]
I've been working on defining the difference between expressing my feelings and dumping criticism and aggravation on someone. Mostly, this happens in exchanges with my husband. Often I believe I am expressing my emotions (something I've read over and over is a healthy thing) and he feels like I am attacking him. I have not mastered [...]
It all came to a head this morning when I noticed Mark had put two more bottles of shampoo and facial cleanser on our bathroom shelf. Space on this shelf is limited. There really is not room for all of the bottles on there now. I had an instant reaction of anger. I felt like my [...]
