How to Build Resilience: Normalizing Struggles Versus Eliminating Them

By |2019-03-22T14:26:36-05:00March 22nd, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

Snowplow parents prepare the road for kids. Responsible parents prepare the kids for the road. Resilience is built not by eliminating struggle, but by normalizing it. Teach kids to see obstacles as temporary hurdles. — Adam Grant My son suffered a concussion in February. He is still dealing with the symptoms. He is going to school [...]

Why We Find More Happiness After Age 50: The Struggles of Our 40s and the Contentment of Our 50s

By |2019-03-15T15:09:45-05:00March 15th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

I turn 49 tomorrow. According to author Jonathon Rauch (The Happiness Curve: Why Life Gets Better After 50), I'm at the bottom of the happiness curve, but things will be on the upswing very soon. He says our 40s are the bottom of the joy trough. Our values change in our 50s to create upward momentum. [...]

Confidence and Completing Things: The Secrets to Evading Anxiety

By |2019-03-10T13:43:54-05:00March 8th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

In order to have real confidence, you not only need to succeed at what you're doing. You need to COMPLETE things (of course, some things should be dropped). If you've been avoiding things in your life, then you can't have confidence. — Benjamin Hardy I've been thinking about how good it feels to complete things. Introverts and [...]

Using Values to Rise Above Heavy Emotions and Take Action

By |2019-02-28T14:01:20-06:00March 1st, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

We've talked about how our deepest voids lead us to our deepest values. In this post, I want to show how our deepest emotions are also signposts to our deepest values. Think about when you find yourself feeling the most sad, mad or enthusiastic. What is going on? Harvard Medical School psychologist and author of Emotional [...]

Three Questions to Smooth Out Conflict and Increase Understanding

By |2019-02-15T11:08:32-06:00February 15th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

One of the most useful things I've learned over the last few years is that it is better to aim for understanding versus winning when it comes to disagreements with the ones we love. For many years — including those competing with my sister for attention and respect and those competing with my ex-husband for most [...]

How to Stop Criticizing and Increase the Safety in Your Relationship

By |2019-06-14T13:39:48-05:00February 1st, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

Safety breeds presence and presence breeds safety. — Harville Hendrix author of Getting the Love You Want I've come to realize, in my efforts to be helpful and efficient, I've put off my fiancé Mark a little. I've worked hard to build a repertoire of knowledge in several areas such as physical health, relationship dynamics, household [...]

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That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un… Read more
Gary
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
Because of your blog, I know that it is possible for me to have the love that I want one day and that I don’t have to be alone.  — Indepthwoman  on space2live
Indepthwoman
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring… Read more
J.K.

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would… Read more

Mom M
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon
your depth of understanding, and talent at sharing it amaze me. Speechless… and for your sharing of it.. Thank you… deeply. *sigh, its like coming back into my body through acceptance….. Sherrie on space2live
Sherrie

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