We push ourselves out into the world to prove we are not weak, lazy, flawed, friendless, too introverted or too sensitive. We make ourselves stay in a heightened state of arousal because we don't want to give up. We want to keep up with everyone else. Resting or taking it easy feels like giving up. It [...]
I had an epiphany the other day. If I don't need the kids or my partner to validate me or help with my worries, then we can all relax. If I can manage my own emotions and self-soothe, then we are all free. If I can stabilize myself, center myself, then it won't bother me if [...]
Cooking with your mate can be a loving and sensual experience. My guy and I usually sizzle in the kitchen but one time our interactions were a little burned and crispy. One sunny morning, I tried a new recipe involving poached eggs and smashed avocado on toast. I decided to go the simple route by foregoing the egg-poaching pan and [...]
I've had to stick up for my temperament and my writing many times. It never seems to get easier. I still feel I'm saying the words 'awkward' or 'weird' when I say I'm an introvert. I still hesitate to say I'm a writer when asked what I do as a career. Both words seem to need justification, validation [...]
Tyler approached me after my Myers Briggs presentation in his high school classroom. A tall young African-American man with long limbs and a wide smile, he'd asked engaging questions and made validating eye contact with me during my speech. There were a couple of other head- nodders and eye-contact holders in the class (Thank God for them!) but [...]
There is an ebb and flow of closeness in relationships. The amount of emotional connection and distance fluctuates. I first noticed this with a crush I had on someone years ago. I remember feeling anxious when our normally quite deep and personal conversations changed for a week or two into more casual surface interactions. There was always [...]
