Three and a half years ago I was deciding whether or not to take guitar lessons.  Underneath the veil of the simple decision were all the possibilities that playing music brings.  It was a chance to move into an artistic world of musicians, writers, creators.  A world that seemed so magical, meaningful and for me, out of reach. I had never been especially musically gifted or artistic.  I was afraid to step outside of my safe routines.  How would this me time affect my family?  Am I being selfish? I was wavering and sent an email to the music school’s owner (Mike Geronsin) saying as much.   He responded with, Why do you feel guilty about taking time for yourself?  I feel it’s the best thing in the world to fill yourself up and then it spills onto everyone else. 

I signed up for lessons and never looked back.

We are all told to take time for ourselves.  You deserve a break.  Go ahead have a spa day or a girls’ night out.  Take a vacation.  Meet your buddies for a drink after work.  Most of the time these breaks are granted as we perch on the shallow ledge of a mental high-rise dive.  We are allowed to stray from our daily routines for a short time in order to pull ourselves together.

What if what we do to fill ourselves up takes a long time but changes our lives? 

Two years before the guitar lessons began, I ventured out into the world of fitness by hiring a personal trainer.  At the time my three kids were five, three and one year(s) old.  The two hours at the gym two times a week with the trainer were my vacation.  When my trainer asked what my fitness goal was I said, To be strong.  I was in mediocre shape when I first showed up in front of Michael (trainer) and his body fat calipers.  I was no athlete.  He only laughed a little at my clodhopper jump roping style and my inability to jog thirty minutes straight on a treadmill.  He taught me to be light on my toes and to do intervals while running.  He had me push ninety pound weights up and down the carpeted floor. He introduced me to other fitness-minded friends.  I found running to be the perfect time to daydream and develop ideas.  I became stronger physically and creatively.  My days of personal training with Michael came to an end but I still use his training sheets to guide my independent workouts.  I am still friends with the women he brought into my life as workout partners.  I still make fitness a consistent part of my lifestyle.

The confidence I gained from being fit led me to try new things, like playing guitar.

So in December of 2007 I began guitar lessons with Mike (Pitch Fever Music Academy).  I am never going to set the world on fire with my playing.  Picture Mike and me in a small room recording Falling Slowly by  Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova.  My shaky fingers pluck out the tune as Mike consciously but discreetly plays louder and fuller in order to fill in where my playing lacks.  Needless to say, I am happy to be the acoustic rhythm guitar player tucked in the back of the stage.  My nerves and shaky fingers are in no way a reflection of Mike’s teaching, just my over-thinking.  In between guitar strumming Mike and I talk about humanity, spirituality and creativity.  I soak up the vibe of the music school; the artistic world I envisioned.  In the three plus years we have been friends Mike has written a book, A Practice of Power and I have uncovered a passion for writing. You can now find Mike at the very successful Youtube channel, The Art of Guitar.

In writing I have found a home.  While taking classes at The Loft in downtown Minneapolis, I feel a sense of belonging.  I am surrounded by others who live to re-live life on the page.  They are observers and poets.  I feel free among them.  The hours I spend learning about writers and writing are completely satisfying to me, so fulfilling that I want to let it spill onto everyone else and do so by playing with my kids and blogging.:)

What do you do to fill yourself up and grow? 

P.S.I recently saw a package of funny cocktail napkins at a gift shop.  They read, Between my trainer and my therapist I can’t find any me time.😉

**Author’s note: This post is almost a year and a half old but the messages and lessons are timeless.  These ventures re-directed the course of my life.  So grateful.**

If you liked What I learned from a Guitar Guru you might also like:

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Steven Tyler and an Introvert: Expanding Through Music, Stillness and the Inner Garden (space2live)

Why I Love Assh*les and Curmudgeions: A Look at Personal Transformation (space2live)

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