I was lit up mentally, spiritually and sexually. Spending the day privately touring the Minneapolis Institute of Arts newest exhibit turned me on. The curator’s detailed and delicious delivery of facts and folklore fed my brain. The intermingling of history, art, beauty, politics and relationships perfectly activated my intuitive spider-web thinking. Ideas and concepts playfully had sex with each other in my mind and stimulated my whole being. My man noticed and benefitted from my unusual energy at the end of the day.
**Take note introverts: One way to bolster energy is to engage your curiosity and learning muscle.
You’ll need maturity and a large one of these to turn me on
I’m a sapiosexual. Intelligence does it for me. A large vocabulary is an aphrodisiac. Philosophical discussion is foreplay.
I do not consider sapiosexuality a sexual orientation. I consider it a lifestyle choice or personality preference. Please do not misconstrue it as personal permission to be pretentious. I’m not encouraging intellectual elitism but simply stating what I find erotic.
I recently posted the following meme on space2live’s Facebook page:
The two lines that resonated the deepest with me were: 1. Maturity is sexy and 2. Having a mentally stimulating conversation is sexy. They hit home because I love interpersonal intelligence. I believe maturity
and good communication skills are hallmarks of gifted thinkers. If you keep your cleverness to yourself or use it to lord over others, then it isn’t sexy or worthy of reverence.
Broad definition of intelligence
My definition of intelligence is broad. I acknowledge many forms of cleverness. You could work with your hands and be titillatingly interesting to me. You could have a fascination with french horns or bullfrogs and be brilliant in my mind. Are you a moving public speaker or ultra-skilled pilot? Are you creative or funny? I’m putty in your hands.
It all has to do with your level of curiosity and passion. I look for an uncommon courage to follow your curiosity and an atypical level of depth. Can you relate your expertise to the human condition? Oh my God, I’m weak in the knees. I admit, I don’t have as high of regard for fact recitation. I’m more attracted to those deeply devoted to the study of humanity and the world. If you have a lust for learning I may lust for you. If you simply spew out memorized tidbits to impress without any basis for their purpose or value, I may actually be turned off.
Physical appearance counts but deep thinking is hotter
I used to think physical type was the igniter of attraction. For me, it is not. It’s all about your mind and how you express it. Can you give me new insight or a rare perspective? Can I engage you in an expansive conversation that leaves us both enlightened? If so, I’m attracted. Erudite thoughts only enhance appearance.
Intelligent = more sexual?
According to the article Sapiosexuals: Why We’re Scientifically Attracted to Intelligent People, bright people have stronger sperm (males, of course) and stronger sex drives. The study cited to back up the latter claim is slightly nebulous but interesting nonetheless. The study is based on sex toy company, Lovehoney’s, finding that elite universities in the UK have some of the most frequent toy buyers. The article used the information to support the idea that intelligent people are more sexual. The study also indicated that the more intelligent you are the less sex you tend to have. Hmmm. Perhaps über smart people are just kinkier or more apt to resort to toys to relieve pent-up sexual tension.
It makes sense to me that high achievers would strive for high levels of satisfaction in all areas of their lives.
The real reason why intelligence is sexy
Most of us prefer a smart partner versus a window licker but the attraction I am talking about goes beyond the outwardly obvious smart vs. dumb. It resonates internally.
It has been my experience that the more worldly, knowledgable and multi-faceted someone is the more open-minded about sex and relationships they are. The more open-minded, the more willing to be vulnerable. The more willing to be vulnerable, the more exquisite intimacy achieved. The more exquisite intimacy, the more our inner worlds light up.
What drives you crazy sexually? What is your definition of brilliant? What would bring exquisite intimacy to your relationship?
If this piece resonated or affected you in a meaningful way, I would truly appreciate it if you would share it with others who may benefit.