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Now, with COVID-19, you fart to cover up a cough. A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says. Hang on, you are telling me that they don't have a cure for a disease that can be killed with soap? Harry Potter wakes up in hospital. 25. Crookshanks has claws at the end of his paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause. He's also a lot friendlier . How would we rate these memes? How many Muggles does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Two decades after Harry Potter's introduction to the world, a handful of developments now cause some longtime fans to view the Potterverse differently than they did the first time they met Harry. After you've got these Harry Potter jokes memorized, check out 75 short jokes to make anyone laugh! 3. "You're also mass-reporting pages to get people to shut up so that's looking a little [raised eyebrows] as well.". At the time, shetweeted a linkto an opinion article headlined Creating a more equal post-COVID-19 world for people who menstruate.. However, what has caught the attention of people is not the concept of 'mix and match' but the main man behind the study Professor Matthew Snape. The study has previously tested only mice, so taking the next step to involve human data could bring more answers. He holds it and the world revolves around him. 10. Knock-knock! J.K. Rowling, the series' author, defended herself last month against continued attacks from transgender activists. Well, loads of things, but considering the silly nature of the question, lets just agree that nothing is more fun! Two Hungarian Horntails walk into a pub. 87 Coronavirus And Quarantine Jokes To Retrain Your Face To Smile. 26. One to rotate the room. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. My husband purchased a world map and then gave me a dart and said, Throw this and wherever it landsthats where Im taking you when this pandemic ends. Turns out, were spending two weeks behind the fridge. As millions of people prepare to face strict rules for another few weeks, some have poked fun at the three-tiered system and compared it to the . In the Harry Potter series 7. Ill tell you a coronavirus joke now, but youll have to wait two weeks to see if you got it. Pandemic pick-up line: "You can't spell quarantine without 'U R A Q T.'". Now, that's the name of a wizard from Harry Potter books (and movies), you reckon? You-know-who? Have their own 3. Harry Potter's hat sorting joke explained. Social distancing rule: If you can smell their fart, move further apart. Dr. Matthew Snape is leading a U.K.-based trial . Given the uncertainties surrounding the COVID-19 pandemic, ATG Tickets reserves the right to shorten or extend this temporary policy. So quid-ditch whatever else you're doing and scroll on you can *expecto* some. She puts her wand in and the cauldron revolves around her. You know what theyre saying about 2020. Just is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. Market data provided by Factset. If Hermione was a mathematician what would her kids be named? "You ran face first into a wall lmao", [harry potter pulled over drunk driving] There arent 9. 28,052, This story has been shared 27,291 times. Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. Anyone else's car getting three weeks to the gallon at the moment? In response to these comparisons, some of the TikTok users who advocated the term have since clarified that there was no intended relation to race, or the Nazis, with the use of the word. My goodness, the amount of times I've head friends say "I had to give my parents a stern talking too for going out". March 02, 2023 2:30 PM. Whats the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo and Juliet? However, we spotted a few of these on Parade, The Dad, Pun Jokes, Quora, Barry Popik, and Tiny Beans, which we can't recommend strongly enough. 24. Shared laughter gives us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit more in control when the future looks uncertain. And those I fight I cannot hate. Wishing netizens on the occasion of Harry Potter Day, the Delhi Police department shared a meme featuring characters from JK Rowling's fantasy series in order to urge people to follow Covid-19 . Characters like the Death Eaters and the Malfoy family were regarded as pure-blood supremacists, believing that only those without Muggle blood should be taught wizardry. What do wizards in Harry Potter use instead of laxatives? Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way. . Harry Potter and the Philospher's Stone was the first book of the bestselling series. OK, so apparently my chance of survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense the rest of the world has? Let us know what you think! What did the astronauts say to NASA when they notified them that their mission was complete and they could return to earth? A rare thing, indeed. Never mind, I dont want to spread it around. Alan Rickman, who played Snape, stands in front of an advertisement for a Harry Potter movie. More on Covid-19 TICKETS FROM $59-$189. "It's . Characteristics 2. OK, so apparently my chance of survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense the rest of the world has? Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! One of them says to the other, Mine are so good at social distancing, they wont even call me.. Any characters 8. I must have had some Felix Felicis, because I think Im about to get lucky. Creative Engineer writing working hypotheses | I write what I wish I could have read when I was younger | Join my newsletter 'I/Q Crew' on Substack. Legal Statement. It has cancelled sports, closed all bars and kept all guys at home! The books have done so much for a generation of children from all backgrounds.". In a recent episode of the adult animated series created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the royal couple are lampooned with a series of jokes referencing events from the last few years. Its the pet-he-grew up with! One of the poshest, whitest, elitist schools in the country - and here she is screaming about a fictional wizard.". Why was Harry Potter such a good computer programmer? How did Harry Potter get down the hill? You can take a walk through the St Pancras hotel that was used for the movies and down the back streets and back doors of London . Nearly one year earlier, the Sunset author who shares Donnie, 6, Margot, 4, and Tennessee, 17 months, with Brown revealed her youngest son, then 3 months, had been diagnosed with COVID and . $25 AT GOPOSTORE.COM. A mechanic. Why didnt the sick guy get the joke? Stuart Hazeldine, a British screenwriter, pointed out that J.K. Rowling - the franchise's creator - was poor herself when she wrote the first book. What should you do if you dont understand a coronavirus joke? Did you hear that vaccinations are controversial in some communities? I hate people that go out in public when they have Covid. Dr. Matthew Snape is leading a U.K.-based trial of Covid-19 vaccines. Hagrid's not the only giant on campus, if you know what I mean. Apparently, it's not the first time the colorfully named professor has been reminded of the fictional reference. "Yeah, would've been much better if it had been written by a woman with no money," Hazeldine wrote. Unfortunately, hes still not able to smell jiu-jitsu. JK ROWLING ADDRESSES THREATS FROM TRANS ACTIVISTS AND RELIGIOUS RADICALS: NEVER SET OUT TO UPSET ANYONE, LONDON, ENGLAND - MARCH 29: J.K. Rowling arrives at the "Fantastic Beasts: The Secret of Dumbledore" world premiere at The Royal Festival Hall on March 29, 2022 in London, England. If coronavirus isnt about beer, why do I keep seeing cases of it? I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets. 09:42 PM - 03 Dec 2013. What will Quentin Tarantino be called if he gets COVID-19? Two of Rowling's "Harry Potter"-related projects have been affected by the pandemic, with production on the latest chapter of her "Fantastic Beasts" film franchise shutting down last month to keep cast and crew members safe. What do you call staging a beer in every room of the house? People with a cold - "I just want to stay in bed and do nothing, I feel terrible"People with Corona Virus - "I feel terrible, I think I will go skiing in Austria, visit the Eiffel Tower and maybe do some white water rafting in Camino de Santiago", Back in the day the only time we started panic buying was when the bartender yelled "last call.". 55. Ask her anything! As social media users caught wind that Professor Snape was working on a coronavirus vaccine study, the news of the trial and a potentially groundbreaking scientific development provoked a response from eager "Harry Potter" fans on social media. who let the dogs out What do you call a house-elf in a hotel? You or someone in your party is not feeling well during the 14-day period preceding the Event and has exhibited symptoms consistent with COVID-19; or. It was announced Tuesday that the trial, which was launched in February using Pfizer's and AstraZeneca's vaccines, would expand to include the Moderna and Novavax formulas, according to the Evening Standard. Hermione: Youre a great wizard, you really are!, Harry: Not as good as you. Hermione: I said wizard, not witch. I do have compassion for both sides of the argument, she added. And nobody knows what time it is. Whats the worst part of homeschooling? Here it is in his own words: Anonymity and being able to be invisible is . Home; U.K. . "We look forward to resuming performances at the Curran Theater as soon as conditions allow," the statement continued. health and science reporter Benjamin Ryan tweeted. Anyhoo, shouldnt we skip to a bit more cheerful topic? 2. And laughter literally makes us stronger. Finland just closed its borders. What do you call a Hufflepuff with two brain cells? The popular video saw the TikTok user with a black and white filter and on-screen text reading: "We will no longer be referred to as unvaxxed, we simply go by" before changing to a colourful filter with the words: "Pure blood. Chuck Norris has been exposed to coronavirus. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. If so, check out our list of the best covid jokes the pandemic has spawned - they are just a bit further down! Whats the best part of teaching your children at home? Its about to get ugly out there. Ill probably hit the living room around 8 or 9. If you need even more puns, look no further: We've got your grammar puns . I found the first four Harry Potter books to be quite light-hearted. Dr. Matthew Snape is an associate professor of pediatrics and vaccinology at the University of Oxford. Terms of Use "Abused orphan boy living in a cupboard under the stairs, neglected by his guardians, haunted by a mad serial killer, friend of oppressed students, refuses to take the most magical tool. Whos there? It flu over his head. People who menstruate. Im sure there used to be a word for those people. Just one. Lynch, who played character . How do you know if someone is a pureblood? Exactly, AVADA KEDAVRA! A number of Harry Potter fans are sharing their shock after discovering that certain 'magical items' from the books do actually exist in real life and turned out to just be British things Why hasnt anyone in Antarctica contracted COVID-19? 4. pic.twitter.com/5uAOMJa4uN. The Best Dark Humor Jokes. Hey Pandas, Who Was Your Favorite Black History Month Icon You Learned About This BHM? who let the dogs out Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. You've been in a coma for 8 years" says the doctor. Comprtenos tu momento ms icnico con Harry Potter y celebrar su 20 Aniversario Full safety protocols for the Lyric Theatre are posted on thetheatre websiteand specific patron requirements will be set forth in the know before you go email notifications. *Breaking News! I'm back to work and now I'm currently in LDR with my dog. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Jaakko Husa, a comparative law scholar, pointed out that the Harry Potter character himself comes from a disadvantaged background. What did the virologist say to the public? What will we call the babies born nine months from now? US residents can opt out of "sales" of personal data. 30 Hilarious Harry Potter Jokes Even Muggles Will Understand. 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Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? He's a little patriarch that resorts to magic and violence to rule," she wrote Thursday. This article was originally published on Jan. 28, 2021. Nail salons, hair salons, waxing center and tanning places are closed. (DON EMMERT/AFP via Getty Images). 83. Please follow the local COVID-19 guidelines and . What do you call a postal carrier who can speak to packages? Why did the chicken cross the road? ", It's difficult to confirm exactly which account the term originated on, as so many of the videos have since been deleted, but various popular users have hopped on the trend. Many of his backers admire his moves to overhaul immigration, his appointment of conservative judges, his willingness to throw convention to the wind and his harsh rhetoric, which they call straight talk. Obsessed with travel? *Breaking News! Why hasnt anyone in Antarctica contracted COVID-19? What are some unexpected consequences of over-the-counter efforts to treat COVID-19? What's COVID-19's favorite chord progression? 141,295, This story has been shared 46,444 times. If I get quarantined for two weeks with my wife and I die. Dobby has no master. Any statement to the contrary erases the identity and dignity of transgender people and goes against all advice given by professional health care associations who have far more expertise on this subject matter than either Jo or I, he wrote in an essay posted onthe Trevor Project website, which focuses on providing support for young LGBTQIA+ people. Shave your eyebrows off. The second one snaps back, "Shut your mouth!". Day 3 without sports. The Mandalorian, who wouldn't even remove his helmet except to non-infectious droids, probably wins the coronavirus healthy practice sweepstakes. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. "I've never read or seen Harry Potter, but my goodness, this woman needs to lighten up!" The problem is that theres a disagreement over whos the most vulnerable. A plague-al cadence. Mariam Zuhaib AP. The Devil's Snare is no joke, so if McLaggen was that bad then I hope our girl handled him the same way she handled the Snare in the first book. "She replied to me "Ammonia Cleaner. 40. Did you hear about the guy speculating on hand sanitizer? I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received from the staff in the last 10 years. Some of these coronavirus jokes, that went so viral just a few years back, have now gained a whole new meaning. "If we're really gonna compare other people's actions to that time period, y'all are the one that's going around rattin' everybody out to the government," said @kats.outta.the.bag in a follow-up video. The main symptoms of coronavirus are: A high temperature. The Dark Lord orders a beer . 20. Ill have a corona, hold the virus. Why doesnt Hermione keep her money at Gringotts? Self, I so late. A single Jewish grandparent 'polluted' the blood, according to their propaganda," wrote the author in a 2007 answer to a fan question online. Because he has only followers, not friends. "This isn't your average book," said Ron. Do you remember on all those Sundays when you just wanted the weekend to go on forever? Another is that the Harry Potter books engendered a love of reading amongst millions of kids (and adults) some of whom thereby expanded their horizons to become students of Cambridge academics when they might not have," Simon Scarrow, a British author, wrote. Which make them unique and interesting 1. 17. Throughout his nearly four-year norm-smashing presidency Trump has stirred strong emotions among both supporters and opponents. Hands up if you think George secretly allowed his ear to be blown off just for the sake of making that pun. 5. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. I can assure you it was not the virus that killed me. But when my suitcase weighed 52 pounds, I was on my own. "OMG the man in charge of mixing the potions is called Professor Snape #vaccines ," wrote one person as the news of the trial's expansion dropped. And 30 People Deliver Sincere Answers, 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, Storage Company Charges Client For Something That Never Existed, So She Pretends Like It Does And Now They Have To Find It, "Can't Approve Overtime? The barman says, We dont serve time-travelers here.. What did the house-elf say when he came from college? If you are in the group of people that thinks that if we just reopen everything and go back to life as per normal, please raise your hand. Aivaras is a SEO listicles curator. You can change your preferences. Funny . What do you call the entrance to a magical gym? This is why I chew the furniture!. Professor Quirrell walks into a bar, unwraps his turban, and presents the Dark Lord's face to the barman. What did one novel coronavirus say to the other? I do wish people would just give her more grace and listen to her., Rowling came under fire in June 2020 after she appeared to tweet in support of anti-transgender views. 88. 30 days hath September, April, June, and November, all the rest have 31, except for March which was infinite. One conjures spells and the other spells conjure. Harry Potter star Jessie Cave has been admitted to hospital after testing positive for Covid-19 while pregnant with her fourth child. * - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. What happens when Harry Potter says accidental? Vaccine skeptics on TikTok are dubbing themselves "pure bloods," much to the amusement of Harry Potter fans, who have explained exactly why the comparison may not be what people think it is. We are told "no" if we get too close to strangers. What do you tell yourself when you wake up late for work and realize you have a fever? "I said "Oh, I am sorry, I thought you worked here.". When we first meet Neville Longbottom in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, he's described as a "round-faced boy" who's clumsy . So youd never know which side he was on. My goodness, the amount of times I've head friends say "I had to give my parents a stern talking too for going out". Put mixture in the freezer for 10 minutes. Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. All rights reserved. Any such exchange request must be made by contacting your point of purchase by phone at least twenty-four (24) hours prior to the advertised performance time. "Tell me you didn't understand the entire plot of Harry Potter, without telling me you didn't understand the entire plot of Harry Potter," wrote one TikTok user. Specifically, Snape's trial focuses on the potential to mix Covid-19 vaccines with various formulas for the first and second doses to boost overall efficacy. Do you really want to continue? The blind wizard goes silent for a moment before curtly replying, No I dont. 52. Whats the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo and Juliet? RELATED: The Best Harry Potter Gift Ideas For Kids: Because Young Muggles Love *Magic*. My mom always told me I wouldnt accomplish anything by lying in bed all day. Please check link and try again. That's just my imaginary friend, midnight desserts. Old folks are sneaking out of the house, and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors. What did the single guy say to the single woman during lockdown? pretend u were driving The first one says, "Sure is hot in here.". The less said about Baby Yoda's practices, the better. and if you smell a death fart, run out of the building and call poison control, Day 121 at home and the dog is looking at me like, See? There's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music. Presented without commentary. who let the dogs out (SWNS). For tickets purchased for performances on or before January 17, 2022, under the following circumstances, ATG Tickets will permit you to (i) exchange your tickets for the same Event at a later date; or (ii) if such exchange is not possible or not practical, e.g., the Event is one performance or limited run, refund your ticket purchase: 1. His name is Ah-Chu. Im saving the world! Hayley Vaughn is a News Associate with the Breaking News team. What did the man say to the bartender? In nine months time there is going to be a baby boom and 12 years later we will witness the arrival of the quaranteens. So quid-ditch whatever else you're doing and scroll on you can *expecto* some good jokes! This story has been shared 141,295 times. You cant be fired for drinking on the job. Why did Harry Potter get pulled over for speeding? I think it is great that people are finally starting to drink water, wipe their butt and wash their hands. Hermione got attacked by a troll in the bathroom. Tickets available until 31st December 2023. Whats the difference between working from home and working in an office?COVID. A search for "coronavirus" on any social media platform yields Purell memes, hamster videos . But were sure someone will still write fan-fiction about it. Your parents may be muggles, but that kiss was magical! 87. HARRY: expecto patronum. Why is herbology Slytherin students favorite class? Legal Statement. Creating an account means you agree with Bored Panda's, We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide, social media features, and analyze our traffic. Somehow he is elite, little patriarch, and resorts to magic and violence to rule," Husa tweeted. 32. For instance, the actor behind Uncle Vernon supported Brexit, Dumbledore is gay, and J.K Rowling has been widely denounced as a transphobe.. People have been spending more time at home reading short books. At least a 9 and 3/4 out of 10. South Park has made headlines for its controversial depiction of Harry and Meghan. Wumben? Children of the Quarn. The first one says, "Sure is hot in here.". Theyre so ice-o-lated. How many Slytherins does it take to stir a cauldron? Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, 30 Y.O. I dont know; its all Greek to me. COVID-19 REQUIREMENTS. You have to be joking me. (Get it? [stag gets behind the wheel] Something for everyone interested in hair, makeup, style, and body positivity. How many Harry Potters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? As a result of the World Health Organization recommending lockdowns, people around the U.S. began adopting shelter dogs. No reason. The fictional Professor Snape, who was played by the late actor Alan Rickman, is the potions master at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Mac and sneeze. Whats the best way to avoid touching your face? This elegant polyster mask features Harry's glasses, the golden snitch, and Prof. McGonagall's signature hat, all tastefully incorporated. Latest News & Numbers. All rights reserved. Two. Quotes displayed in real-time or delayed by at least 15 minutes. In a saucepan, heat up the white chocolate and sweetened condensed milk on low heat until combined and smooth. Like your body hasnt got enough to deal with. Dumbledore: Are you serious? Snape: No, Im Severus., This article was originally published on March 10, 2020, A Man Went Viral For Refusing To Give Up His Spot On A Ride To A Crying Child, An American Mom Shares The Utter Magic Of Danish Playgrounds. On this tour, you'll get to discover some of Edinburgh's Harry Potter-themed sights with an informative guide. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. I didn't even finish the first book. The videos have racked up hundreds of thousands of views, but there's one flaw in the name that viewers have pointed outpure-bloods in the Harry Potter movies were on the bad side. Gifted. Did you hear that vaccinations are controversial in some communities? 77. When they werent running for their lives, Harry and his friends Ron and Hermoine were being fun-loving kids who kept us smiling from time to time. How would you rate the quality of the article? Thirteen years later. The guy who stole my diary just died. Who is there? How do you socially distance while around family? Aivaras is a student trying to pave the way to his career in Marketing and advertisment creation. Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! Crookshanks has claws at the end of his paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause. The world has turned upside down. If you use your stimulus check to buy baby chicks, then you got the money for nothing and the chicks for free. Join half a million readers enjoying Newsweek's free newsletters. The actor, best known for her role as Lavender Brown, says her symptoms have lasted for weeks. And whats better than original jokes about a hackneyed topic? Yes, dang it, three years already! Well, it turns out that jokes about returning back to the office or taking up new healthy habits are now completely true! What will we call the babies born nine months from now? Anna Tingley. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. What goes great with Corona? A coronavirus vaccine study led by Dr. Matthew Snape, a professor at the University of Oxford in the U.K., sent "Harry Potter" fans into a frenzy. The coincidence of names spawned jokes and memes about the real-life Professor Snape in connection with the one from the "Harry Potter" books. UK weather presenter squeezes multiple 'Harry Potter' puns into 70-second forecast. Politics doesnt end after two weeks. It seems that our Professor Snape is trending We'd like to confirm our Snape is NOT a 'Dark Arts' professor. School Report Card. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.Just's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. 'I do wish people would listen to her' Harry Potter star Evanna Lynch . Because the chicken behind it didnt know how to socially distance properly. A wizard walks into a pub and orders a Forgetfulness Potion. We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. The Curran had originally announced Wednesday, March 11, that "Harry Potter" performances would continue as scheduled, but with a limited number of audience members to adhere to a citywide ban issued by Mayor London Breed earlier in the day that restricted events for . You are speaking to a Hufflepuff. or redistributed. Fans go wild over moment Kate jokes with Prince . Dr. Charlotte Proudman, a Cambridge academic and feminist founder of the U.K. group Right to Equality, was slammed on social media after she criticized the Harry Potter franchise as being too White and patriarchal. Pettigrew!). 38. For months nobody has walked into a bar. Also Aivaras like's to watch and play sports, especially football. what have you found during your period of enlightenment? All yoga instructors are now under nama-stay-at-home orders. 82. Fox News contributor Douglas Murray discusses the left's attempts to cancel author J.K. Rowling. "Welcome back. You're welcome. "If you think Myrtle moans, just wait until you spend the night with me . Whats the best way to avoid touching your face?