Over the years, I've suggested many of my coaching clients seek warm, kind, safe people. I have my clients notice when they feel relaxed and at home with others and when they do not. Ultimately, they spend more time in settings and with people who make them feel at ease. The idea being the more warm [...]
At the start of a brand new year, I'd like to talk about hope. It seems appropriate as the possibilities of 350+ new days lie before us. If we can muster hope, we have a greater chance of fulfilling our goals and getting through tough times. Why? Because, according to positive psychologist, Charles R. Snyder, our [...]
I've discovered I like to accumulate points or create a streak when I want to instill a habit into my life. That motivates me. My meditation app on my phone, insighttimer.com, gives me a gold star for every ten days of meditation I do. I like to see the days add up. You get a [...]
Some of us have been primed for high reactivity. Our early caregivers or past relationships did not provide consistent comforting and nurturing, so our nervous systems developed a sensitivity to possible abandonment. We tend to react strongly if we feel at all threatened. Sometimes these strong reactions lead to self-fulfilling prophesies. The more we react, the [...]
When we have a secure attachment style we have a basic trust in others and we are able to set good boundaries for ourselves. We believe our partners are there for us and we do not have a problem being there for them. Avoidant attachment Some of us grew up with shaky attachments to our parents [...]
Photo by Gabriel Silvério on Unsplash In his book, "Happiness by Design", Paul Dolan PhD, defines happiness as experiences of pleasure and purpose over time. Examples of pleasurable experiences might be having a drink with your spouse over dinner or watching a comedy on TV. Examples of a purposeful experiences are exercising or helping [...]
