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Testimonials

For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i…
Niko
Because of your blog, I know that it is possible for me to have the love that I want one day and that I don’t have to be alone.  — Indepthwoman  on space2live
Indepthwoman
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
J.K.
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
your depth of understanding, and talent at sharing it amaze me. Speechless… and for your sharing of it.. Thank you… deeply. *sigh, its like coming back into my body through acceptance….. Sherrie on space2live
Sherrie
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need …
D.R.
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon

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How to Avoid Contempt and Keep Your Relationship Safe

By | 2018-09-19T14:04:03+00:00 July 6th, 2018|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Popular Posts, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Tina Fey eye roll I learned about the direness of contempt years ago when my marriage was ending and I happened to read Malcolm Gladwell's noted book, Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking. In the book, Gladwell speaks with Dr. John Gottman — marriage expert and scientist. Based on years of studying married [...]

Love After Divorce : Knowing When to Commit Again

By | 2018-04-05T10:40:22+00:00 March 30th, 2018|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

Photo credit Sylvia Bartyzel via Unsplash I have been on my own since January of 2012. In those six plus years, I've experienced so much. I've dated, loved, dumped and been dumped. The whole time learning how to find a secure partner and how to be a good partner. The whole time experiencing in the [...]

Parents Need Love as Much as Their Children Do

By | 2017-06-14T10:33:30+00:00 June 16th, 2017|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

So much of parenting is giving — time, attention, patience, food, guidance, love — incoming emotional sustenance is indispensable for balance. ...Parents need each other for support and replenishment.  — Thomas Lewis, MD, Fari Amini, MD, Richard Lannon, MD, A General Theory of Love So much of our emotional well-being depends on the amount of reassurance and [...]

When Divorce Looms: Suggestions and Understanding for Those In a Dying Relationship

By | 2016-08-01T07:32:09+00:00 October 30th, 2015|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Marriage is hard. Long-term relationships are hard too. I experienced the slow disintegration of my marriage and I've been privy to a few other marriage-in-flames stories, stories where the plane is going down and the relationship won't survive, although it may flame out slowly. It seems the route of choice is often years of hellish tension with barely tolerated tolerance followed [...]

First Year On My Own: Divorced, Dating, Parenting, Me

By | 2016-08-29T13:13:30+00:00 December 7th, 2012|Categories: Parenting, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

Reflecting on My Youth - Joanne Smoley I can't believe it's been almost a year since Jeff moved out.  Didn't we just tell the kids that we make each other sad and we can't stay married? It seems like only yesterday I was having the suckiest New Year's ever. I remember thinking last year in [...]

First One Over the Wall:What It’s Really Like to End a Marriage and Start Over

By | 2015-10-26T13:43:51+00:00 June 1st, 2012|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Popular Posts, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , |

After we started the divorce process, my ex-husband made the comment, You're the first one over the wall. At the time, I knew of several women who found their marriages deeply unfulfilling and/or unbearable. Even though they were miserable they were afraid to take the leap and end it. Now I wondered if they were watching to see [...]