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This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i…
Niko

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would…

Mom M
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t…
Evan H.
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
your depth of understanding, and talent at sharing it amaze me. Speechless… and for your sharing of it.. Thank you… deeply. *sigh, its like coming back into my body through acceptance….. Sherrie on space2live
Sherrie
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
J.K.

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Free Chapter from The Quiet Rise of Introverts: Getting Past Independence, Principles of Love and Relationship

By | 2018-10-09T15:57:45+00:00 December 15th, 2017|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Nathan Walker on Unsplash Hello! I wanted to give you a small gift. It is a link to a PDF of Practice Four: Getting Past Independence in my book, The Quiet Rise of Introverts: 8 Practices for Living and Loving in a Noisy World. This chapter talks about how hard it is to [...]

Performance Based Love Doesn’t Feel Like Love : Parenting So Our Kids Feel Secure

By | 2018-09-10T10:53:46+00:00 December 8th, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

I said, "How are you?" to my son the other day after school and he replied, "OK, but I had a math test today that was hard." It was obvious the tough math test weighed on my guy's mind. It seems often my kids' happiness depends on their grades or status in their extra curricular activities. [...]

Six Ways to Equanimity

By | 2017-12-02T12:01:46+00:00 December 1st, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo credit Leio Mclaren of Unsplash In last week's post, I promised to tell you how I reached my current state of equanimity. First, I would like to give you a working definition of equanimity. Here is Wikipedia's version: Equanimity (Latin: æquanimitas having an even mind; aequus even animus mind/soul) is a state of [...]

Repairing Ruptures in Your Connections with Family, Partners and Yourself

By | 2017-11-17T13:44:35+00:00 November 17th, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , |

photo credit Ib Wira Dyatmika Every relationship has times of disconnection. These times are not concerning unless 1. They are constant and highly stressful or 2. There are no repairs made. In fact, relationships where there are ruptures in connection but consistent and quick repairs, tend to have the most resilience. Disruptions in therapy or [...]

Do You See Good People or Bad People? Using Mindfulness to Improve Our Outlook

By | 2017-11-11T09:57:03+00:00 November 10th, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

  I believe most people are good. This belief may be due to the upbringing and life experiences I've encountered. It may be because I have a learned habit of reframing most experiences to highlight the positive. Whatever the reason I know not everyone agrees with me. I had a long-term love who openly declared he [...]

Is Efficiency Ruining Our Ability to Love, Learn and Enjoy?

By | 2017-08-23T13:42:32+00:00 August 25th, 2017|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Like most people, I've adopted a level of efficiency as a survival mechanism. With three kids, a home, a career, a partner and friends, I strive for effectiveness so I can keep going without getting buried under it all. I eat leftovers, put things back where I found them, have a system for ordering groceries, do [...]