Stay connected

Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts.

Testimonials

You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i…
Niko
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un…
Gary
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t…
Evan H.
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need …
D.R.
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
J.K.

Join us on Facebook

How Good Are You at Accepting Others?

By | 2018-07-27T09:08:28+00:00 July 27th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash During a three-hour car ride, Mark (fiancé) told me he accepts me for who I am. He doesn't ever try to change me. I agree with both statements. I always feel loved by him. He also said he feels I don't always accept him. I sometimes want him [...]

Avoidant Attachment in Adult Relationships: The Truth Behind Our Need to Be Alone

By | 2018-07-30T17:17:21+00:00 July 20th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash People with an avoidant attachment style grew up with caregivers who devalued or avoided emotional and physical closeness. Dependency was denied, leaving the child to figure out ways to self-soothe and regulate their own emotions. When the child reached out for closeness, they were met with disappointment or [...]

Division of Labor: How It Affects Relationships

By | 2018-07-11T15:29:04+00:00 July 13th, 2018|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Daniel Chekalov on Unsplash "When parents let their teen believe they are too special to do ordinary work, they raise "handicapped royalty" — young people who study brilliantly and are full of conviction but don't know how clothes get clean or how to read a credit card bill."  — Dr. Wendy Mogel, [...]

How to Avoid Contempt and Keep Your Relationship Safe

By | 2018-07-06T12:09:52+00:00 July 6th, 2018|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Tina Fey eye roll I learned about the direness of contempt years ago when my marriage was ending and I happened to read Malcolm Gladwell's noted book, Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking. In the book, Gladwell speaks with Dr. John Gottman — marriage expert and scientist. Based on years of studying married [...]

Attachment Styles in Romance and Parenting: Moving Toward Love Rather Than Away

By | 2018-06-21T12:50:40+00:00 June 22nd, 2018|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Dominik Vanyi on Unsplash Our basic attachment styles form during childhood. I've written about attachment styles in several articles on brendaknowles.com's blog, space2live, but I'll summarize the different styles to refresh your memory. The most ideal style is secure. A secure attachment arises when we know we can count on our primary [...]

Feeling Unseen? This is What Cherished Feels Like

By | 2018-06-14T11:25:34+00:00 June 15th, 2018|Categories: Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

Photo by Zoriana Stakhniv on Unsplash What does it take for us to feel cherished? Before our divorce, I used to tell my ex-husband I wanted to feel cherished. I believed it meant being seen and loved as myself — not for taking care of the house, not for feeding the kids or for [...]

Stay Connected
Sign up for updates now and receive a FREE guide for setting boundaries!
We respect your privacy.