Top 5 Posts of 2019: From Remarrying and Reclaiming Space to the Dark Side of Kind People

By |2020-01-01T20:00:32-06:00January 3rd, 2020|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , |

This year has been a big growth year. Boy is growth is uncomfortable. From health issues to financial stress to a new marriage and blending families, this year tested me. I did not always pass. I experienced many strong and negative emotions that I had not felt in a long time. That's what long-term relationships do. [...]

Which Do You Really Need More, Alone Time or Community?

By |2021-08-23T13:19:45-05:00December 13th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

I have had two radical belief changes in the last few years. One: I now believe our long term relationships shape our personality and temperament more than introverted or extroverted innate traits. Two: I used to believe I needed alone time to recharge and be at my best. I have recently seen and felt myself most [...]

Reclaiming Your Space and Loving Yourself

By |2019-08-25T16:01:49-05:00August 23rd, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , |

It all came to a head this morning when I noticed Mark had put two more bottles of shampoo and facial cleanser on our bathroom shelf. Space on this shelf is limited. There really is not room for all of the bottles on there now. I had an instant reaction of anger. I felt like my [...]

High Sensitivity or Childhood Stress? What Causes Reactivity or Withdrawal

By |2019-06-26T16:18:08-05:00June 28th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

I recently read In the Realm of "Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction" by Dr. Gabor Mate´. I've found Dr. Maté's philosophies and experience regarding addiction and its origins fascinating. Essentially he says pain is the fuel of all addiction. We use substances and behavior to self-soothe. He does not believe it is primarily genetic. He [...]

Roommate Issues, Defensiveness and Attachment Wounds

By |2019-06-23T10:28:47-05:00June 21st, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

Since our home has recently added three new people (my fiancé and his two sons) and a cat, lifestyle habits and roommate issues are top of mind. One of my clients mentioned feeling challenged with her roommate as well. I know from countless podcasts and relationship books that little issues like, "Why didn't you pick up [...]

When an Introvert and an Extrovert Combine Households

By |2019-06-05T09:42:41-05:00June 7th, 2019|Categories: Anxiety and Depression, Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Coaching, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

Things are getting serious here in the Minneapolis suburbs. Over Memorial Weekend Mark (fiancé), his two sons (ages 22 and 18) and their cat moved into the home I've been living in with my kids for 14 years. The actual move went relatively smoothly. Mark and I chipped away at the packing and unpacking. Now there [...]

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Because of your blog, I know that it is possible for me to have the love that I want one day and that I don’t have to be alone.  — Indepthwoman  on space2live
Indepthwoman
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i… Read more
Niko
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best… Read more
Sharon

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would… Read more

Mom M
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t… Read more
Evan H.

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