I know I’m not supposed to talk about it but sex and sensuality are on the tip of my tongue and very often heating up my thoughts. What can I say? My whole being is alive, including my body and its desires.  I’m newly divorced and newly carefree.  I feel like a twenty-something with the wisdom of 42 years.  It’s glorious.

Sensual:The condition of being pleasing or fulfilling to the senses

I’ve always loved sensuality. Evocative, provocative.  Yes please.  I love and live for exquisite lines, colors, scents, images.  Beauty.  A beauty that goes unnoticed, I notice.  I drag my feet so I can see it.  I slow my breath so I can absorb it.  I  take it inside and blend it with me.  Let it hydrate my soul.

Subtle in the Suburbs/ Sex in the City

Sensuality is the lingerie of sex.  It’s a lace and a sun-kissed shoulder.  It’s lower backs curved and uncovered.  It’s silk on skin and breath on inner-thigh.

I sometimes feel alone in my sensuousness out here in the suburbs.  Few talk about it.  Even less take time to get lost in it.  It exists but it is not a natural priority. Do good schools kill it? Marriage? Children? To me, sensuality is an elixir to an ailing marriage, it makes life beautiful and sexy, reminds you you’re an adult with an eye for the remarkable. Yes, sensuality lives in the suburbs but it’s subtle, very subtle. Raw sexiness thrives in the vintage shops and crooked sidewalks of the city.  It flirts in the grit of diversity and dances between the sheets of loft apartments.

Fifty Shades of Grey poked a hole in the dam of purity.  A release as natural as a sigh after orgasm. True, it is more sexual than sensual but I feel less alone in the lust knowing Fifty Shades is a phenomenon in suburbs, cities and cow-towns.

Music: A Sensual Language

Music is sensuality alive. Voices from a deep god.  Lyrics from everyone’s psyche, pulling and caressing love and bitter to the surface. Making us swollen with feelings and impregnated with oneness.  Tones and notes as natural as the wind, as moving as a still morning ocean.  It’s a beat that encourages your body to move with fluidity and without inhibition. It teases out the sexual self. Insists you’re free. Music is a trip to long ago complete with lingering fragrances and forgotten smiles. It’s a language felt more than spoken.

 Sensuality in Front of a Camera

I stumble upon more and more opportunities to bathe in sensuous awareness. Recently a friend asked me to pose for some photos (fully covered but teasing nonetheless). I jumped at the chance. I highly recommend immersing yourself in allure and soft arousal.

Photo credit EmissivityImage.com

Fabrics of femininity, flow and feel.  They float on my skin and skim my curves and angles.  The camera whirs and snaps.  I laugh and squint.  Bare feet and a glass of good white wine.  Chiclet teeth against mocha lips.  Mocha blouse against pale breast. No shame, just sensuality.  No regrets just pleasure.  An afternoon of natural light and play.  Sexy talk and averted gazes.  He the photographer.  Me the bowl of fruit.

Sensually Repressed No More

Yes, I’ve always been sensual but I haven’t always been free.  Free to touch, express or be perilously open.  Most of the time the choice to play it closed was mine.  Artistic vision and passion buried itself deep within my comfort zone. Revealing a taste for deep beauty especially if it involves musk-laced bodies or creative vulnerability, is on the edge of the norm.  It will stop people in their tracks at school functions but not at intimate lunch dates. Choose your company wisely and you can be free.

The senses provide gifts every day in every moment. Pay attention. Pause to touch your clothing, smell the soft air, taste citrus and salt and hear love expressed in a gesture.

You are sensual.  You are new and renewed. You are absolutely alive NOW.

When was the last time you felt sensually satisfied? Where do you feel most sensual? Why?

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