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This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t…
Evan H.
Your words are my lifeline.  I sit down to your posts and as I read I can feel my acceptance of myself and my needs grow.  Your words validate my feelings about my life, motherhood, relationships and it is something I hold onto.  And during the times when I feel like I am not able to be a mother or a wife or a sister or a friend or whatever someone needs me to be, I go back to your words and find some peace…I send your posts to my husband when I need him to understand that I love him but I need …
D.R.
Brenda has truly opened up a space for introverted types on the ‘net, and her self-revelations are always inspiring. Her voice is one I always look forward to. She is one of the writers that actually played a part in my return to writing.  — S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
S.E. of Sunflower Solace Farms
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
J.K.

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would…

Mom M
That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un…
Gary
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
I have been dating an introverted man who I am very in love with for almost 2 years.  Reading your posts have helped me to be more supportive and understanding to him especially during the times when he needs space.  I just wanted to thank you for your weekly posts and let you know how helpful they are for someone who is in a relationship with an introvert. C.M. on space2live
C.M.

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Books 2015-09-25T12:24:29+00:00

Self-awareness for Introverts and Highly Sensitive People. These books provide the knowledge and research to give you greater understanding of the introverted and/or highly sensitive nature:

Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength by Laurie Helgoe. Helgoe uses personal examples and researched data to enlighten us about the introverted way of life. She relates our nature to artistry and conscious living. She has an Idealist’s mentality.

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain. This is the holy bible of introversion. It provides a general but accurate overview of all things introverted. It offers a view of the introversion/extroversion balance through history. It explains the biological origins of introversion. It talks about work and love in the introverted realm.

The Introvert Advantage:How to Thrive in an Extrovert World by Marti Olsen Laney. This is the first  book I read on introversion. It explains the biological aspect of it. It talks about what makes an introvert an introvert. It confirmed I am an introvert. It has a section on parenting. If you want the basics, this is the book for you.

The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You by Elaine N. Aron. After working with an introvert coach for a few weeks she let me know she suspected I was a highly sensitive person. I had never heard of such a thing but the self-test in Dr. Aron’s book confirmed it. There are sections on lifestyle, social relationships, love relationships and spirituality. All through the lens of a highly sensitive person.

Supportive, encouraging, validating. These books provided mentors, messages and deep, sometimes spiritual, lessons:

If You Want to Write: A Book About Art, Independence and Spirit by Brenda Ueland. You do not have to be a writer to gain from this. No other author has ever made me feel as validated for my sensitive way of being.

A Whole New Mind: Why Right Brainers Will Rule the Future by Daniel H. Pink. Intuition, innovation and creativity will finally prove more valuable than fact and information spewing.

A Woman’s Worth by Marianne Williamson. Empowering and spiritual. Contains such gems as, “…a career grows out of who we are; who we are doesn’t grow out of a career.”

A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle: A classic. A beautifully peaceful read about why we must live in the now. This is the book that started me on my path to a more conscious way of being.

The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work and Sexual Desire: A tad controversial for its descriptions of masculine and feminine essences, but enlightening nonetheless. Taught me that some people grow through praise and appreciation while others grow through challenges.

Choose Yourself: Be Happy, Make Millions, Live the Dream by James Altucher: This book gives you a simple yet thoughtful life map. It inspired my writing and career. James Altucher is one of us:intuitive, sensitive, deep thinking.

Relationship enhancing books to increase intimacy and satisfaction. These books offer original insight and real life application. I thumb through them all regularly when my relationships hit gridlock:

Passionate Marriage:Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships by David Schnarch. Dr. Schnarch’s goal is to teach you to hold onto your self and embrace your partner. He teaches us how to maintain our integrity while in a relationship through differentiation. Case studies accompany his writing. Sexuality is covered thoroughly.

Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel. Perel discusses how to keep intimate relationships erotic. She suggests giving each other space rather than becoming ‘one’. Appealing to an introvert.

Please Understand Me II: Temperament, Character, Intelligence by David Keirsey. Keirsey defines four temperaments based on Myers Briggs typology. His theories simplify the Myers Briggs 16 types into four detailed temperaments. He includes chapters about mating and parenting for each temperament.


 

 

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