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“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would…

Mom M
Because of your blog, I know that it is possible for me to have the love that I want one day and that I don’t have to be alone.  — Indepthwoman  on space2live
Indepthwoman
Your site has saved my sanity and my life. Maybe even my marriage. I work part time and have two young boys at home, my husband is supportive of me but until recently I thought I was going crazy. … Reading your writing not only inspires me to pick up the pen again, but gives me nourishment in the deepest places. I will fight for balance. Everything you write is spot on… And wellness is so incredibly multifaceted.  I was ready to give up hope, but understanding myself through your words is bring…
J.K.
I have been dating an introverted man who I am very in love with for almost 2 years.  Reading your posts have helped me to be more supportive and understanding to him especially during the times when he needs space.  I just wanted to thank you for your weekly posts and let you know how helpful they are for someone who is in a relationship with an introvert. C.M. on space2live
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I think I want to print out your articles and hand them out as a sort of relationship waiver form. “You want to be my friend?….You are interesting in going out? Here read this first. Sign here to acknowledge that you have read and understand the enclosed material. Thank you.” Seriously. I think it would work. — Guerin Moorman
Guerin Moorman
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i…
Niko
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan
THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t…
Evan H.
This is me. This is me from the day I was born. For so long I felt misunderstood and rejected, even by the people closest to me, because they could never understand my need for solitude, and I had no idea how to explain it to them. Even now that I know more about Introversion and have a more informed understanding of my hard-wired need for solitude, it’s still very difficult sometimes to help my loved ones understand this profound craving for time and space all to myself. This is one of the best…
Sharon

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A Guide to Spirituality For Introverts

woman fall alone in woods

This is a pop-up guest post in the middle of the week to remind you to pause and breathe. Pay attention. Reflect. Evolve. Enjoy!

Spirituality is the focus on the self, personal growth and understanding. For introverts, this can be daunting. It means stepping away from the laptop or book and spending time with our inner most thoughts. In many ways, introverts are perfectly suited to spirituality as it is often a solitary pursuit. While solitary confinement is used as a punishment in prison, it is used by spiritual seekers to achieve wisdom and transcendent feelings of wellbeing. Here’s how spiritual practices can help introverts to overcome their weaknesses and find inner peace in an extroverted world.

Becoming Outwardly Focused

To easily achieve spirituality, try reconnecting with nature. This takes you away from the everyday distractions of modernity, into a place of calm and tranquility. You have probably already felt the liberating feeling of being alone in nature. It is the perfect way to relieve stress and feel a sense of inner peace.

The reason for this has been found by researchers at Brighton and Sussex Medical School. They found that the brains of those who had spent time listening to the noises of nature revealed an outward focus, while those who listened to artificial noises showed an inward focus. Inward focused minds are linked to feelings of depression and anxiety. An outwardly focused mind has become mindful of the external world, so the perception of self begins to drop away.

You can practice this skill when feeling nervous in a social situation. Simply refocus your attention to the people and objects around you, rather than becoming lost in your own head. Once that sense of self begins to recede, so too will feelings of anxiety.

Mindfulness Links to Happiness

If you are spending substantial time alone and less time interacting with others, then you need to be able to control your thoughts. Being alone with dark or negative thoughts will start to chip away at your wellbeing, with the potential to lead to serious mental health problems.

Mindfulness can create happiness by helping you become aware of your thoughts and understand that they are separate to you. You are not defined by them. Mindfulness is a kind of meditation focused on the present moment, to stop you becoming lost in the anxieties of the past and the future. It can be practiced at any time or place, whether you’re alone or interacting socially. For beginners, try using a guided meditation app.

Introversion and spirituality go hand in hand. You may have thought that it is for social people who spend time at festivals attending communal yoga ceremonies. In reality, spirituality is for anyone who wants to take control of their thoughts and find inner calm and happiness. Overcoming the ego is within anyone’s grasp, so why not start your spiritual practice today?

Sally Collins is a professional freelance writer with many years experience across many different areas. She made the move to freelancing from a stressful corporate job and loves the work-life balance it offers her. When not at work, Sally enjoys reading, hiking, spending time with her family and travelling as much as possible.

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