Stories for and about those who recharge in solitude and feel life deeply.

Self-Soothing and Not Giving a F*ck : Managing Your Own Anxiety Within a Relationship

By |2019-10-01T16:09:53-05:00March 13th, 2015|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , |

I had an epiphany the other day. If I don't need the kids or my partner to validate me or help with my worries, then we can all relax. If I can manage my own emotions and self-soothe, then we are all free. If I can stabilize myself, center myself, then it won't bother me if [...]

Please Don't Watch, Observe or Scrutinize Me:Too Much Attention Makes This Introvert Nervous

By |2015-09-22T16:06:00-05:00March 6th, 2015|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

Cooking with your mate can be a loving and sensual experience. My guy and I usually sizzle in the kitchen but one time our interactions were a little burned and crispy. One sunny morning, I tried a new recipe involving poached eggs and smashed avocado on toast. I decided to go the simple route by foregoing the egg-poaching pan and [...]

Do Your Friends and Family Think It’s Weird to Be an Introvert? Getting Past the Stereotype and Doing Work You Love

By |2015-10-26T08:21:24-05:00February 27th, 2015|Categories: Guest Posts, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

I've had to stick up for my temperament and my writing many times. It never seems to get easier. I still feel I'm saying the words 'awkward' or 'weird' when I say I'm an introvert. I still hesitate to say I'm a writer when asked what I do as a career. Both words seem to need justification, validation [...]

What’s Your Temperament? An Introverted Idealist Talks Soul Mates

By |2015-10-21T14:25:10-05:00February 20th, 2015|Categories: Emotions and Energy, Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , , , |

Tyler approached me after my Myers Briggs presentation in his high school classroom.  A tall young African-American man with long limbs and a wide smile, he'd asked engaging questions and made validating eye contact with me during my speech. There were a couple of other head- nodders and eye-contact holders in the class (Thank God for them!) but [...]

How to Handle the Fluctuations in Emotional Security and Closeness Within a Relationship

By |2015-10-21T14:18:49-05:00February 13th, 2015|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Parenting, Personal Evolution, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

There is an ebb and flow of closeness in relationships. The amount of emotional connection and distance fluctuates. I first noticed this with a crush I had on someone  years ago. I remember feeling anxious when our normally quite deep and personal conversations changed for a week or two into more casual surface interactions. There was always [...]

Are You Tired of Your Partner or Tired of You? Looking for a New Relationship or Looking for a New Self?

By |2015-09-22T16:06:01-05:00February 6th, 2015|Categories: Introverts and Highly Sensitive People, Personal Evolution, Processing Divorce, Relationships|Tags: , , , , , , |

  Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are looking for another self. It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become. — Author of Mating in Captivity and couples [...]

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Testimonials

THANK YOU….. you just summed up my swirling thoughts into something i can read with out everything else in my head meshing with it. I finally feel like i can explain what happens within without getting distracted. I’m an Introvert with ADD and it makes it so hard to explain quite what im feeling sometimes. — M.G. on space2live
M.G.
I met Brenda and took the MBTI… I had a fairly good understanding of these types before the meeting but was impressed by the depth of knowledge that Brenda shared with me. She clearly has a passion for this work and a gift in imparting the information. There have been doors opened for me because of our talks… — Alan Hintermeister
Alan Hintermeister
Because of your blog, I know that it is possible for me to have the love that I want one day and that I don’t have to be alone.  — Indepthwoman  on space2live
Indepthwoman
During one of the harder times in my life I found Brenda’s website
and reached out to her. To say the least it has been one of the best
decisions I have made. Being an extrovert I never quite understood
what it meant to romantically involved with an introvert. Brenda does
an incredible job listening, giving in the moment feedback, and helped
me understand the how an introvert functions. She helped explain to me
that I am introspective extrovert, and this gave something to identify
with and allowed me t… Read more
Evan H.
For the first time in my life I could truly explain, through your words the way in which I experience life and myself. Brenda… It all fell into place. I had found myself and had such a moment of clarity. It felt like such a big weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Finally I felt like it was ok to be me. I was not the only one. I had found people and a little space where I fit in. … I was at work and crying on the inside. Emotions ran wild inside me. I was ecstatic, sad, confused, motivated, i… Read more
Niko

“I was struggling with my daughter (16 at the time) and our constant fighting. You said something to me that changed my life! You were speaking about your own situation and you said to me “my child could not handle my emotions”. This was a HUGE “lightbulb moment” for me and it forever changed the way I dealt with my emotions when I was around my daughter!

I am happy to say that things have never been better between my soon to be 18 year old daughter and myself! I honestly never thought we would… Read more

Mom M
You’re so honest in your writing. It’s bold. It’s frank. It’s wonderful. I could definitely see the work you are doing here as a useful book. It could save/make a lot of relationships! — Jimmi Langemo
Jimmi Langemo
That courage and dedication you so generously share with the world, has inspired me to push myself a little harder, persevere at each task a little longer, dig a little bit deeper to where the answers just “feel” right to both my humanity AND my spirit. Your insights have reinforced my direction and given me additional tools that help me clear my path. I’m wired into my creativity as never before and the new music is pouring out of me faster than I can record and produce it; this is the Un… Read more
Gary
Thank you for all the words. You’ve created the magic drug I’ve been looking for all my life. Your blog has transformed my life, and I feel like I am on the brink of a most satisfying fulfilling journey…You’ve made me see everything in a new light. I now feel calmer, able to care better for my toddler, less hateful of people around, and hopeful for my future. I am not so afraid for our marriage anymore. — Shilpa CB
Shilpa CB
BRENDA: thank you SO much! Your advice is exactly what I need to do. I am amazed how much you “get” me after only exchanging a few messages!… Again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You’ve helped me more than a year of therapy sessions! – Megan on space2live
Megan

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